I love Christmas, but I kinda wish it would go away already

I just can't get into the Christmas spirit this year.  I just can't do it! I've tried, really I have.  I watched "Love Actually" with Bruce while decorating our tree and living room.  We watched "Hook" because he said it was a Christmas movie.  I watched "Mean Girls" while steaming my couches cause hey there's a Christmas scene in it.  I just haven't felt Christmasy.

Usually by Thanksgiving evening I turn my radio to the San Antonio Christmas Station and listen to nothing else to Christmas Day.  But this year I kept getting so annoyed with it and switched back to Garbage on my iPod, or Drive-By Truckers.  I just couldn't do it!  At work I was sometimes able to listen to the Pandora Christmas station, mostly because they played a lot of Michael Buble Christmas music and I do love me some Buble. I compromised and listened to Rent- totally a Christmas musical- but had to keep turning it down so my office neighbors wouldn't hear the lyrics.

As of Monday I had yet to buy a single Christmas gift.  I had barely given it a thought! I just couldn't figure out what to get everyone! I started going out on my lunch breaks and knocked out some of the family members on my list but still it felt like I was just getting it out of the way.

I just don't feel Christmasy!!!  Maybe it's because it's my first Christmas since I left SAC, maybe it's because money has been tight this year, maybe it's because mama almost died earlier this year, maybe it's because I haven't sang Christmas Karaoke ONCE this year! maybe it's because Haley has a baby and everything will forever be different, maybe it's because I bought a house this year, maybe it's because in the next few years we may have a baby, maybe it's because I don't have a chimney, maybe it's because I'm afraid my puppies will eat my Christmas tree and it's behind a baby gate, maybe it's because we're all getting older and we'll all forever be different.

Maybe it's because I didn't watch Ally McBeal. Usually this time of year I re-watch Ally McBeal and see all the fabulous Christmas episodes.  The one with the Christmas Unicorn, the one where Elaine finds a baby in Jesus' spot in a manger.  The one where Elaine tries to sing with Taye Diggs pissing off Renee.  But Ally McBeal always makes me super emotional and Haley says I can't watch it unless I'm in a different frame of mind (she says that in her way).

I don't know, I'm just in a Christmas funk.  I haven't wanted to watch "Prancer" or "Little Women" or "Meet Me In St. Louis" either.

I did at least discover a new Christmas song that I am in love with and whenever I hear it this year it does make me happy.

I hate scary movies...I'm scared

I hate scary movies.  I get scared looking at my backyard with the porch light off.  I get scared when AC kicks on suddenly after its been quiet for a few minutes. I can scare myself, I really don't need my movies help with that.  I can scare  myself to sleeplessness just thinking about scary movies I haven't even seen.  I'm a wimp, I know it and I'm fine with it.

When I was a kid my dad really liked scary movies and would often watch them in the bedroom where I would casually walk in and get an eye full of Chucky (From Child's Play) burning in a fire and then coming back to life with a glowing red eye.  I would then procede to run screaming from the bedroom and out the front door of the house all together.  In later years I would running screaming from the room when daddy watched Predator, Alien, the Omen, or Alfred Hitchcock Presents.  So it's only fitting that my father would take me to see scary movies in theaters when I got old enough.  It's not just horror films, busy scary Sci-Fi really gets me too.  With my father I saw Jurassic Park (ran and hid outside of the theatre during the Raptor scenes), Blair Witch Project, Event Horizon and Signs.  He really should have known better, after the Blair Witch Project I slept with the light on for weeks.  We saw Jurassic Park in the theater 6 times and every time I ended up in the theater lobby waiting for the man in the outhouse to get eaten by the T-Rex and the kids to be safe from the Raptors in the kitchen.

There were some scary movies I could deal with, I never found Poltergeist too traumatizing, I'm not one of those peoples who finds clowns scary.  I could watch Carrie and the Shining no problem.  In high school I thought I was getting better, I wanted to be brave and thought maybe I had outgrown my fear.  My senior year I saw the Ring with some friends and remembering clawing my escort through his leather jacket so hard his harm was bruised afterwards.  My friends had extra fun teasing me a few weeks later when at a lock-in at the Magic Children's Theatre they pointed out a cabinet that had what looked like the Ring tree etched into it.  One of them hid inside it to jump out at me while I screamed my head off to their laughter.  Apparently I didn't learn my lesson that time cause at the end of my senior year I went to the movies with the same group to see 28 Days Later and slept with my lights on till I left for college that August.

Throughout college I successfully avoided scary movies till my last semester, unless you consider Harry Potter scary, which sometimes it totally is.  I took a group of residents when I was an RA to see Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and one girl told me when a scary part was coming and I still managed to scream and startle the half of the theatre that didn't find the final maze particularly creepy.  My last semester at TLU I decided to take a Film Studies class just for fun.  It ended up being a difficult class but what was worse was I saw on the syllabus later in the semester one of our in class viewings was going to be Alien.  OMG are you serious? I was going to have to watch Alien in class with my professor and peers.  I warned my professor that I tend to scream during scary movies and then rush out of the room quickly so I don't die.  He told me that I could scream all I want but that I had to stay and watch the whole movie.  I tried to surround myself with students who had seen it before and asked them to warn me of the scary parts.  But apparently they were all taking notes when the scary things happened and I ended up screaming every 20 minutes whether things were scary or not.

A few years later again wishing I had outgrown the scary I saw I Am Legend on a date.  Horrible, horrible idea.  At the time I lived by myself on the third floor in my apartment complex.  I liked it cause it was quiet, well that was why I usually liked it, but after watching that movie I was convinced the scary vampire zombies were going to skip the bottom floors and break down my door to eat me.  Lights stayed on in the entire apartment for a week.

When I started dating Bruce a few years later to my inner-chicken's nightmare he turned out to like scary movies.  Although he had some serious delusions on what actually was scary versus what was really scary. Zombieland is not funny, it is scary and you will suffer for making me watch it.  Sean of the Dead is NOT funny, it's scary and I will sleep with the lights on cause you made me watch it.  No I will not see Paranormal Activity 1, 2, or 3 with you cause they are scary.  I don't care how campy the scary movie may be, or if it's a parody of other scary movies, I don't do Zombies and if scary things happen in Space I will probably die, while I can appreciate that Event Horizon  was a cool movie, it still scares me and the fact that Sam Neil was also in Jurassic Park means that he'll forever be uber scary to me. I think by now Bruce has come to terms with the fact that I don't do scary movies and I like to think that it is one of the last things I can blame on my dad.  Maybe if I hadn't seen Chucky rise out of the ashes of that fireplace with a knife as a 5 year old all would have been fine.

What made me think of this the day after Halloween? I've seen a surprising amount of these movies on io9's list. 

My Sister is Making me an Aunt

A month from today my little nephew is scheduled to make his highly anticipated debut.  November 22nd, 2011 is a day I have been waiting for since Haley got married.  My sister, my best friend and future mother of my nephew is having a baby! This act along with my marriage, my home, Master's Degree and my new job round out 2011 as one of the best years I've ever had.  I'll never forget the day she told me besides my wedding day and I'm sure the day Isaac Archer Swift enters the world, the day she told me she was becoming a mother was one of the best days ever.

The spring was so busy with my new job, internship and preparation for the wedding I didn't really want to do anything special for my birthday.  So the Friday of my birthday week I met mom, Haley and Greg for lunch.  We went to Yardhouse at LaCantera and had a big booth in a mostly open dining room.  Mama ordered appetizers and a bloody mary, I couldn't have one cause I had to go back to work.  When Haley and Greg got there we ordered and then they told me I should open presents even though I had previously said I didn't want any.  Mama gave me vodka :) thanks mom it was delicious.  And Haley's gift was in a bag with a box that said Coach a card and a folded piece of paper.  I went straight for the Coach box but Haley scolded me saying there was a card in there first.  When I open the card and the folded piece a paper there's a sonogram in there.  I screamed.  I screamed like in the movies and the other 5 diners in the restaurant turned to look at me, mom asked what's wrong and I announced to the room "sorry, my sister just told me she's having a baby".  Like in the movies people clapped and then I started to cry buckets.  I hugged my beautiful sister and greg and stared and stared at my future nephew.  

Since that moment at lunch I've been so excited.  I still get misty eyed when I think of Haley telling me and I think about her becoming a mother.  Throughout her pregnancy I've done research with her on numerous baby products, read customer reviews, mommy blogs and shopped in the baby sections.  I've talked to her after all her doctors appointments and asked about the baby every time we speak.  I've worried with her if she thought something was wrong and screamed for joy when everything goes as it's supposed to.  I can't wait for November and the joys it'll bring.

Haley is my best friend and my sister and that's the best combination because it's a relationship that cannot be broken.  While we may fight and argue ALL THE TIME, we never stop loving each other.  Once Mr. Isaac gets here our worlds will change forever, our relationship will change forever but it'll all be for the love of a child which makes it okay.  I love Haley and Greg and Isaac more and more everyday.  I'm so excited to be an Aunt and so excited to be the sister and best friend of the woman having this baby.

Puppies and Ringworms

Bruce and I are now the very happy owners of two beautiful puppy goddess.

Hera the Goddess of Women

Hera is our beautiful German Shepherd Dog.  She's almost 5 months old and feisty as hell.  She's got her puppy teeth and isn't afraid to use them. She is my puppy.  If we're home alone together and she can't see me she'll come find me, she likes to keep me in her sight.  If Bruce is home that's another matter- then she's usually attacking his feet.  She knows her name and comes running when you call her. She's a beautiful beautiful dog and I can't wait to see her grow up.

Helia is a Sun Goddess (previously Akai)

 Helia is our mutt...kinda.  The Vet said she's a Red Heeler, but it's very obvious there is something else in her too.  When she walks she totally looks part boxer so we'll see when she gets older.  She is a total sweetheart.  Her puppy teeth are still kinda dull so it takes her a little while to eat her treats and if she doesn't eat them fast enough Hera lets her know by stealing them.  Helia had a rough start to life, she was tied up with wire and left in an ant pile- so when GaDaH-SA got her she had tons of cuts and a rash.  Most are all healed up but her tail is still super sensitive and if Hera gets a hold of it she cries and then runs away.

We were originally supposed to just have the one pup but Bruce's heart melted for Helia so we had to take her too.  Helia and Hera love to play all the time, especially when Bruce is around.  With me they're cool to just chill and nap in the living room.  They do know the tricks though and sometimes wont come back in the house unless enticed by a treat.  They love the big backyard and can run around in it all day if we'd let them.  They've found weaknesses in our fence a few times and escaped- luckily only going as far as the neighbors front flower bed.

We have them still sectioned off in the front of the house and Sookie the Viking Kitty has the whole back to herself.  Every once in a while while the puppies are out in the living room she'll come to the baby gate and torment them, then I can't get them to leave this spot till she goes back away.

We don't plan to keep them separated forever, just temporarily.  While they get over...

RINGWORMS!

ICK! My poor babies came down with ringworms.  One day I notices a spot missing hair on Hera's nose and then it started to get bigger.  Then I noticed she had more on the tummy.  On Helia it was harder to tell since she had already had some spots on her from her previous life as an abandoned pup.  It was so sad I felt terrible for the puppies.  I took them to the vet and met up with GaDaH-SA Jenny and the vet told us what I already new, that they were in fact ring worms and that both of them had it pretty bad.  The vet gave us some antibiotics and an anti-fungal pill to give them daily.

Hera's look to be healing quite nicely but poor Helia got them bad on her tail.  And she wont leave it alone! Yesterday before I went to work I noticed some dried blood on the floor in the kitchen and soon realized it was coming from Helia's tail.  She has been biting the thing raw.  I called the vet for advice and she told us to give the meds a little more time to work but in the meantime to wash it and try to put some of the ringworm ointment on it.  So last night Bruce and I cleaned it off with hydrogen peroxide and then slathered it up with ointment.  She screamed and cried throughout the whole thing and hid in Bruce's lap.  Luckily this morning things looked so much better.  Her tail was pink again and looked less irritated.  We'll probably keep washing it daily for a little bit now.  But I think she'll be okay.

For now both pups seem to be taking the medicine pretty well.  But their puppy-mama cannot stand to see them sad or in pain.  So every little wince and wimper breaks my heart.  After puppies with ringworms hopefully it'll only get better.  They have already filled our house with such love, I know it will only grow.

Puppies! Puppies! Puppies!

A little more than a year ago Bruce and I adopted our cat Sookie.  She's a beautiful 20 lb Maine Coon and we're totally in love with her.  She's everything a cat should be, lovable when she wants to be, weird most of the time and a total bitch when it suits her best.  I have an entire album on Facebook dedicated to the furry mess so I may be a little more in love with her than Bruce. 

Sookie the Viking Kitty

We've always talked about getting a dog when we were finally in a house, cause its just not fair for a pup not to have a yard.  When we've talked about dogs German Shepherds always came up over and over.  So after we got in the house I started looking online.  Most of the summer I found nothing, but since we had rescued Sookie we wanted to try and rescue again, there are just sooo many good dogs out there that need homes.  In early August however I got lucky and found a rescued German Shepherd PUPPY! I was amazed! You never find German Shepherd Puppies that are rescued- I think it's cause they're too damn cute! 

This is Hera.

Hera was rescued by Give a Dog a Home- San Antonio in May with her sister Athena.  Unfortunately Athena died from Parvo and then Hera got pneumonia.  Hera has been off her antibiotics for a week now and seems to be doing great.  She goes back to the Vet today for her final check up and if she's all cleared we could be getting her very very soon.  Adopting Hera is a very interesting process theres a 6 page application, 2 reference letters from non-family members and a reference letter from your vet.  After that there's an in-home visit and a two week trail period.  If all goes well with the Vet today then we should have the home visit this weekend and start our trail period next week- I'm super excited.

The lady who runs the dog rescue is really awesome and has invited us into her home to spend time with Hera while she's been sick.  The first time we visited about 2 1/2 weeks ago Hera didn't have a lot of energy and we mostly played with the other dogs.  She has 4 full grown German Shepherds of her own PLUS 1 she's fostering and 3 puppies.  It's dog-city there.  The second visit was just me and Hera had just finished her antibiotics and had become very playful.  She played all around with this cute Red Heeler pup and then kept coming back to me to make sure I was watching.

Hera and Akia playing together

I'll figure out how to rotate the video later and edit it...If you have suggestions let me know :)

Last night Bruce was able to come again and got to see Miss Hera in all her puppy glory, but Bruce of course fell IN LOVE with another dog!  The nerve of him! Little Miss Akia both times has come over to him and fallen asleep on his lap and licked him and just shown a more all around interest in him than Hera.  Hera likes me better and will definitely stick by my side if things get too rough in the dog house for her.  So now we are discussing the two dogs and its horrible.  I still have my heart set on Hera because she's more protective and you can already tell that she'd be a good loyal Shepherd, but Akia is also very very sweet and adorable but we don't know all that in her, we see some Red Heeler but there could also be pit bull and so we just don't know what to expect.  Either way we've told Sookie about the incoming dog and she is not happy...it's okay Sookie don't cry mama still loves you.

Is it fall yet?

I love summer. I love love love summer. I do. I love to wear sundresses, go swimming in the river, go swimming period and I love getting at tan and toasty.  BUT this summer has been hellacious.  I know we don't have it as bad as some people and I know we are truly truly blessed to have what we do have, but has anyone besides me been keeping a record of all the horrible things that have happened this summer?  It seems like everyday in the news this summer someone has died, killed themselves, been raped, been on trial for being a horrible person, shot up a summer camp- I mean it's been an icky icky no good summer all around.  So when compared to all of that my summer stuff doesn't seem nearly as bad, but it sure as hell is enough to make me wish it was fall already.

Top Five Reasons Why Tyler's Summer Was Crappy
5- Summer started out with my mother in a coma for 6 days and in a hospital for a month
4- Bruce and I had to cancel our honeymoon and may not get the money back for the cruise
3- The day after my mom got out of the hospital my Grandma fell and broke her hip
2- The week after Bruce stopped being able to see out of one eye one day and had to get eye surgery to fix that 1- In July my Grandfather (mom's dad) died

While the first four have all been taken care of.  My mom is doing amazingly (even though the doctors don't know what the hell happened).  My grandma recovered like a pro and was in the hospital and therapy less than a week.  Bruce's eye healed up and he can see as well as he could before.  We rescheduled our honeymoon for next week, it's no cruise, but it is Vegas and we love the place.

The only one that isn't really fixed or taken care of is my Grandfather dying.  There really never is any fixing it when someone dies, but all you can do is take comfort in the fact that if they were in pain or suffering then they aren't anymore.

Maybe it would be more appropriate to say that I have had an emotional summer or a emotionally crappy summer, because all of this on it's own would normally of course not be okay, but it wouldn't constantly feel like the hits keep coming.  Small things have gone wrong, small things that seem so inconsequential to anyone else but when piled together with the frustration the rest of the summer has been are enough to make me constantly tired and drained.  Small things missing my graduation cause my mom was in the hospital.  I still graduated so I can be happy about that, but it feels like it just passed and was very unnoticed because we were all doing something else vastly more important.  Another think like the pretty flowers my cousin and I planted dying- even though I watered them everyday and they sure got plenty of sunlight.  My art exhibit not getting the supplies needed till the day before the exhibit opened.  My washing machine deciding to stop spin drying clothes forcing me to hand wring them before throwing them in the dryer.

Small very petty things I know, but it's been a long, hot, emotional summer and I'm just ready for it to be over with.  We go to Vegas next week and when we get back it'll be a sprint for school to start and hopefully then things will get back to normal and less stressful and way less emotional.

On the opposite side some very good things have happened this summer to counteract all the bad.
#2 Haley found out she's having a boy! Which is the best news ever
and
#1 Mama woke up even when the stupid doctors told us to pull the plug- and as long as I keep thinking of that number one thing then everything else totally seems doable.

The Problem With My Kitchen

OMG I love my kitchen.  I really really do, it's open and has a huge window (currently concealed behind Bruce's tapestry thing) and it's just big enough for two people.  But...once I got all my stuff in there I realized it's definitely too small to have what I would normally like to have out on the counters out on the counters, if I ever want to do any serious cooking.  Which as of today I have still yet to cook anything on my stove top...I know, I'm a bad wife.

Here's the problem...

Here's a better view of the problem...

I have very little counter space to begin with.  Currently the microwave has to live on the counter because there is no where else to put it.  In a perfect world I'd be able to mount it above the range but the headroom above the range is already too shallow.  The kitchen aide can really only go on top of the counter- and it's way too pretty to hide away anyways.  The blender usually lives on top of the counter as well because I use it like everyday.  All my cookbooks currently live on the counter because I don't have my super awesome wall spice racks turned into bookshelves yet.  The waffle iron shouldn't be on the counter I don't know why it's there but I'll move it immediately when I get home.  The dish drying rack I guess can move into the left sink but really what else am I supposed to use the counters space above the dishwasher for.

BUT even if I move all those things and organize a little better- I still have very little cabinet room.  The bottom cabinets are TINY.  I only have two drawers.  The cabinet to the right of the sink is really narrow.  And my pantry well I'll deal with the pantry later, I really really dislike the pantry but I'll make it work.  But like I said I still love my kitchen.  More than two people can stand in it- which is a vast improvement from the narrow, narrow, narrow kitchen we had at the apartment.  I like to be able to turn around in my kitchen and take a step back and all those little things.

This I do not see as a problem, except for the rug thing hung over the window.

This area doesn't bother me.  It's the perfect size for the table and it'll work fine.  Once we pull the table out a little bit you'll even be able to walk behind it and I'll have plenty of room on the wall for my plates. The tapestry is concealing the sliding doors and a 1 1/2' space between the sliding door and the other wall.  It's a lot narrower than I thought.  So I'm either gonna have to get smaller spice racks, or just figure something else out, but I do still want my cookbooks there. And drapes, drapes, drapes, gonna have to figure out how to have them but not hide that little space on the wall otherwise my whole plan will fall apart and I'll cry.

Sookie likes it when I pull the tapestry up cause then she can see outside and sit in the sunbeams.  Not relevant to the post but Sookie's cute.

Anyways so yesterday I did work a little more on the decorating stuff and went to Hobby Lobby. I love Hobby Lobby, they always always have sales and coupons online.  Coupons + Sales = lots of savings.  Guess what I found?

PLATES! On sale for $2 down from $7 I only bought one but if I go back later this summer and they are marked down more I'll buy 'em. I got the Asparagus one cause it's yellow.

Then since wall hangars were already cheap $1.99 no matter the side I snatched up one of each size so I could test them with my plates to see which'll work.  And then because frames were 50% off I bought a couple large sized clip frames, cause I can't pick out real frames to save my life and everything looks nice in a clip frame.  All in all I spent very little at Hobby Lobby and will go back next week to check out what new sales they're having.  

Current plate collection is kinda sad- that big wedding plate though is HUGE 17" diameter luckily my plate hanger works up to 18", the blue one looks way cooler in person and the IHOP one looks loved.